I deserve it!

Ever since I started crocheting, I have mostly made gifts for other people. I have also recently started selling my handmade items. I have very rarely made anything for myself. Why is this? Is it a woman thing? or a crochet thing? My mother was also like this.

I think that as women, we are trained to put our needs and desires aside in favor of those around us. When my daughter was little, I had friends who bragged because they spent all their time with their kids, never spent time alone with their husbands, and had given up their hobbies. But is that really a good thing?

I know that as a mom, I have considered myself selfish. I go on dates with my husband. I have hobbies that I enjoy. My kids aren't with me 24/7. Is this wrong or am I a better wife and mother because of it?

I also think that as women, we don't feel that we deserve nice things. How many times do our children have nicer clothes than we do? Or do we make things for everybody but ourselves? I think that it's time to realize that we do deserve nice things. I would even say that our children need to see that Mom is worth it. Our children see the example that we set for them. Do we want to teach them that Mom isn't worth it?

Over the summer, I made myself a shrug. Here is a picture:





My goal is to make more stuff for myself because I am worth it!

Confession!

I have a confession to make. Until about a year ago, I always thought of crochet as my mother's thing. I crocheted out of necessity but it wasn't my passion.

My mother passed away 20 years ago. She was a very creative woman and very generous with her creations. Eventually, crochet became her passion. She would crochet beautiful potholders and give them to people who had blessed her in some way. She made other things too such as afghans and baby blankets. When I was in college, one of my coworkers wanted a crochet baby blanket. She offered to pay my mother to make her one, but Mom made it for her for free. She very rarely made things for herself.

When I was 22 I was expecting my first baby. I really wanted her to have a crochet baby blanket but my mother had passed away 2 years before. So, I taught myself how to crochet and made a couple of baby blankets, a sweater, and a couple of pair of booties. I also made several Christmas gifts that year.

Over the years, I would crochet at times. I often made gifts and very rarely made anything for myself. Crochet was a skill that I had and I enjoyed it but I didn't think I was very good at it.

Last year, I decided to teach myself to knit. I decided that I would give up crochet and devote myself to knitting. I learned and I made a few projects but I found myself frustrated at my lack of skill. Eventually, I realized that I had been crocheting for a long time, I really did know what I was doing, and I had even started to crochet some of my own designs.

I decided that I would work on improving my skills and I have done just that. I refuse to say that a pattern is too difficult. There are plenty of resources available if I'm having trouble with a new stitch or a technique. My recent adventure with socks is proof of this. I have been determined to crochet myself socks. I took a pattern with mistakes in it, modified it, and now have a good pattern to create socks with. I also have several ideas for some sock patterns of my own.

My biggest regret is that my mother is not here to see how I share her love and passion for crochet. It is my hope that she would be very proud of me.

I have a new kitten and she is becoming my crocheting partner. Of course, most of the time she wants to play with my yarn. However, there are times that she curls up beside me or on my lap. I really enjoy those times.

I did it!

For the last year, I've been on a quest to create socks for myself. My ultimate goal is to only wear handmade socks. Last year, I taught myself how to knit. I discovered toe up socks and that makes total sense to me. I have a large foot and would be afraid of running out of yarn. The nice thing about toe up socks is that you can try them on as you go. I found Wendy's Generic Toe Up Sock pattern and probably have cast on 20 socks. I was never happy with the short rows. So, I never finished a pair.

After a few months of knitting, I realized that I can crochet much better. I have been crocheting for 18 years. I also realized that I really do like to crochet and it has become my passion. So, I decided to crochet a pair of socks, again using a toe up pattern.

My first pair was a total flop! The yarn I used didn't have much stretch so it wasn't a good choice. I also used an after thought heel and they were very tight around the ankle. So, I didn't finish them.





So, I concentrated on other projects for a while. In August, I joined Ravelry and a crochet a long for socks. So, I tried the Ultimate Crochet Socks pattern. I like the pattern until I got to the heel. I ended up with a very big heel. I did finish the sock and started another one. I used a different gauge and it was better. However, the sock was way too long.



Yesterday, I had "duh" moment. I had been trying to crochet socks that were 10" long, that's how long my foot is. I realized that I could make my sock shorter than my foot. So, I decided to shoot for 9" and start the gusset when the foot was 6". It worked!!!!! I finished my first sock and it fits perfectly and looks nice! It only took a year but I figured out how to make myself socks.